Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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