He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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