I hope mine doesn't look like that
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
