Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
birth control should be required to get into college
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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