i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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