i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
