dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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