so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
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