I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
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