Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
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