dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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