It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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