Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Do you still have your period?
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
