I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize