glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Randomize
