He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
