i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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