a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
