were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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