Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
