so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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