Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
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