I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
