i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
