I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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