some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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