did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
