i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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