Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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