You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
