never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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