I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
