Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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