Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
