I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
