were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize