we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Randomize