Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
