mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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