If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
YAS. BRING CRAB.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
