what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
