dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
