I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
