He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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