I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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