69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
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