I think I can smell my own vagina right now
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Be still, my beating vagina.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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