I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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