First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
