I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
