Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
