i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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